A Note from Andromeda Siren

March 01, 2026

Thank You.

Not because it is more important than other stories, not even because it may help others - although I do hope that is the case. It became imperative, because the traumatic experience that shook my world and my family in 2023, has taken years to work through. In three years we have come a long way yes, but it hasn't been pretty, it hasn't been easy and the most important thing for me? Was to find the person who became lost when our world imploded. That person being ME.

I have found writing "Siren Stories" has allowed me to remember what I have already survived, from my childhood trauma, to raising a family with special needs. All the trials, all the life experiences I have had, writing Siren Stories has allowed me to realize - I've already survived so much - I can survive this too. 

A Note About Siren Stories

I want to be clear, Siren Stories is not some redemption arc story. "Happy Endings" and fairy tale fluff - won't be in this series. What you can expect however - is something I am extremely dedicated to- owning my $#!^. 

My recovery has been messy. The process of my recovery has actually left me with more regrets than my life has ever carried before. I know I was suffering with a mental illness, but so many close to me - just didn't understand how trauma made my brain 'sick'. 

I behaved in ways my 'healthy brain' wouldn't have. At times I was toxic - the pain in my heart shook me to the core of my soul. 

Some people saw this weakness - this vulnerability - as an opportunity to take advantage of me. 

I hurt people I love with my actions and behaviors. 

I lost control of all my emotional regulation - nothing made sense. I had never felt so alone. I had lost the ability to use my favorite personal quality - my brain. 

I've always been grateful my mind works the way it does. It moves fast, processes fast and I understand things rather quickly. I type over 78 wpm and read the entire Harry Potter 7 book in 24 hours time. I absorb things. I learn things. I always have one real goal - be better tomorrow than I am today - in whatever it is I do. 

For years I was the family manager. I handled all the finances. I handled all the kids needs. I ended up homeschooling when we found that our oldest was struggling, not retaining information and I was fighting to find services. 

I never wanted to be a mom, I wanted a career. Life had different plans and I ended up a stay at home; homeschooling mother of 3, because it was what was best for my family. 

Finding out my husband was on the Autism Spectrum in 2010, I began to realize - my childhood trauma was affecting me. I had toxic behaviors - and on top of that? I had spent almost 10 years expecting things from my husband that his new diagnosis offered explanations to. I began to understand his struggles and realized how my toxic behaviors were essentially torturous for him. 

I didn't like the way I saw myself after that - and I wanted to be a better wife, and a better mom and so I began the journey of really working through my issues, learning to understand them, learning to understand my family's struggles. If they struggled? I found a way to shield them - and carry all the responsibilities within our family with the exception of actually making money, that- my husband did. As an OTR Truck driver he was home maybe 52 days a year- we had no real family - estranged from both our sides. We had moved from our home state - and had few friends - those we did have? Pretty much disappeared when our middle son was diagnosed with Autism. 

Still, for years - I carried responsibilities on my own. Kept my emotions at bay so as to not overwhelm my family and did my best to learn to be 'better' in all aspects of who I was as a human being. 

The Result

No one ever thought I would break- I could handle everything. 

I never thought I would break - I mean if I hadn't  broken yet - how could I? 

So when I did break, it was like a shockwave that rolled through our family. Unable to function, days were dark. I would get up in the morning starting my day with a shot of tequila despite having not touched alcohol in 8 years. I never took off my sun glasses even at night. I would have random fits of bawling. I struggled with depression. I couldn't get out of bed for almost a year overall. I had the most massive anxiety. For the first time in my life? I hated who I was and what it felt like to be inside my mind & body. 

Desperate to do anything to change the way I felt. I made bad decisions. I hurt people. I struggled with myself constantly. 

This healing journey isn't one that should be read lightly. It's real. It's raw. It's messy. 

There are no heroes, there are no 'saving graces' - just a real true story about personal struggle. 

I am not perfect, I am human. 

I am aware that sharing my story in such a real and raw way will likely bring a lot of hate, anger and judgment- but there is no one who can judge me more harshly than I have judged myself. 

I was asked, "What do you hope people will feel when they first open your book to read it, my response: "Open Minded." I hope that those who read my book will keep their mind open and understand - although you may think you've walked a mile in someone else's shoes - it doesn't mean you have the same size feet. 

No matter how my story is received - the real authentic nature in which I am willing to share the most painful experiences of my life - is what matters to me. I don't want to sugar coat things - I don't want to dramatize things - I just want to share my experience - because no matter what you may be going through - no matter how alone you may feel - the will to heal is the greatest weapon. 

You have to want it. You have to fight for it. You have to put the work in to achieve it- and my story - is proof that if you can just do those things - you can survive it. 

Three steps forward - two steps back in recovery, but it's all about staying one foot ahead each time. 

What would I say to those struggling with mental health? 

It's scary - but only YOU know what YOU need to get YOURSELF together. 

Nobody can save you - this is a personal journey. 

You have to be willing to accept things you don't like. Do things that are scary. Only you can find the best way for you.

I personally am a huge advocate for mental health professionals. So many people look at them like "head doctors", but I disagree. They are teachers, there to help you learn why you may be affected by the things that life can throw you that is out of your control. They help sort what causes confusion. They are there - to offer you insight to yourself - not to 'fix' you- YOU have to fix YOU. 

What you do with that insight and what you work to change in your life so that it becomes something you can enjoy living? 

That - is personal - and different for each of us. Support Groups, Self-help books, Medical professionals, courses that teach about whatever mental health struggle you have. Knowledge is power - and you can take back your power a lot better, a lot faster - if you understand how your personal situation is affecting you. 

Above all - don't give up. I know the days can feel like one more just is too much. I know what it's like to feel like your soul has dropped into the darkest abyss. I know how hard it can feel to just keep trying. 

YOU ARE WORTH THE FIGHT

So many days I wanted to give up, so many times just felt like too much - and yet, here I am- 3 years later, living my life dream on the coast, with my Jeep and my Dog - writing my life story. 

Three years ago if you told me this is where I'd be?  I never would have believed it. I wouldn't have believed my brain would function as it once did. I never would have believed I would find emotional regulation again. I never would have believed that I could find a way - to become the person who I needed most. 

You can too.